LunarMusings

Tripping Along The Journey

I have a massage I'm running off to in a few minutes.  And just before I took a moment to sit down at my computer to check for any last minute emails before leaving, I realized just how much I was running off to a massage in a few minutes. 

I actually ran this morning, and yet long after I went for my run, my head, the voices, the lists, the habit continued to run even though there was a stretch of 45 minutes where I sat down to watch last nights episode of Grey's Anatomy.  I was sitting, watching, doing nothing, and yet, the whole of me was running lists, sensations of pressure, and the anxious "oh... I have to get up and do something" mode.

So, I'm sitting here.  With intention.  With some long deep breaths.  To stop for a few minutes and slow it all down, turn it off, reconnect with conscious intention and approach my hour of healing massage with a restful mind.  I'm not beating myself up this time.  Its just a habit I trip over every now and again.  I lose track of the momentum building up around me, and let myself get whisked away and in the letting go, sometimes the noise that has been such a habitual friend gets trip on again. 

I am off to get a massage.  And rather then run off, I'm going to skip, stroll, dance my way there. 

Flow Temple in Los Angeles

Last night, after my grump fest, Jon and I went to a Flow Temple Party.  Dan, the organizer is a friend of Jon's from Thailand.  It was such an amazing experience.  Essentially, anyone who is an artist is invited to come and participate in the creative Flow.  Dancers, musicians, painters, sculptors, fire spinners, acrobats, photographers...  The purpose is to come together and allow the energy to move us all in creating.  It was fabulous, and last night was especially wonderful because some of the best Poi Spinners in the world came by.  The video you see below is of a fire dancer named Yuta, who hails from Japan, and has quite a following.  I am trying to find videos of last night on Youtube to share with others, and this one is the best so far.  You can actually see me in the background in the first half of this video! The last half of the video is at the end of the evening with the musicians left their instruments, and just let loose vocally.  So much fun!

I must say that this evening was the perfect remedy for how cranky I was feeling early in that day.  It was such an inspiration and energy rush to be in a room full of creative people celebrating each others art.  Most were performance artists, but there is room for all, as there are tables set up around the parameter of the space so artists can paint, sculpt, draw, etc while the music and the dancing is being performed.  I also got a chance to see Jon spin fire for the first time and it was quite frankly the sexiest thing I have ever seen.  No words...   :) I will be posting some of the photos I took last night on my Flickr stream in the upcoming days.  Stay tuned!

Cranky and Venting

I'm so cranky today.  I can feel it under my skin...  Have any of you ever had that?  It seems as if my flow is blocked at every turn.  Had some plans, expectations, needs for how I would work, be, organize and relax and for some reason... not going to happen.  The vision?  Kicked to the side. 

And I wonder if its hormonal.  I mean really, intellectually I get that I can go with the flow wherever it wants to lead me.  Its not like anything that is presenting itself is a big deal, some of it actually fun.  But its the inconvenience of letting go of the plan.  Ugh.  This is my stuff.  And sometimes I'm good at going with what spontaneously wants to happen... today?  Not so much. 

Oi... you have no idea how cranky I am.  I hope the rest of you are starting your weekend off in a much better mood!

My Sacred Life Sunday: Sister Tribe

My Sacred Life Project

I'm feeling a bit dry when it comes to typing, but its been such a lovely weekend filled with gatherings with Soul Sisters.  I've been hiding out a bit, trying to get work done, but this weekend was a biggie.  I needed a fix.  So Thursday night was a May Day ritual to affirm the Goddesses that we are, Saturday I hosted a dinner for 3 other fabulous girlies, and this morning I had hot Mexican chocolate with my Sweet Sister Heart, Tree.

Its been a lovely weekend, and now I have the rest of my Sunday afternoon to play with my art supplies.  Its a beautiful day indeed.  I am so grateful for the laughter, the love, the witness that our friends bare for us. 

Connections of the heart buoy us up, fill in the gaps created by exhaustion, and inspire... as in create a fresh deep, cleansing breath of air. 

Thank you my Beauties.  I love you all!

My Sacred Life Sunday: Of Women and Wolves

My Sacred Life Sunday

From my readings in Women Who Run With The Wolves:

"Because women have a soul-need to express themselves in their own soulful ways, they must develop and blossom in ways that are sensible to them and without molestation from others."

and

"In a single human being there are many other beings, all with their own values, motives, and devices.  Some psychological technologies suggest we arrest these beings, count them, name them, force them into harness till they shuffle along like vanquished slaves.  But to do this would halt the dance of wildish lights in a woman's eyes; it would halt her heat lightning and arrest all throwing of sparks.  Rather than corrupt her natural beauty, our work is to build for all these beings a wildish countryside wherein the artists among them can make, the lovers love, the healers heal."

I am sitting deep with this today.  Everything in this book takes me to a deeper terrain, a slower pattern of sifting through the details for my makings.  But this wisdom gives me much pause.  I have always thought of the lessons in balance in my life to be about how to give each of my Self parts equal time, each of the commitments, loves, responsibilities in my external life equal attention.  And even after realizing that balance is always dynamic and sometimes one aspect of my life gets more time, attention, priority then others for a time, and then later that shifts again, I still operate from a place that keeps each of these aspects in nice and neat boxes.

I am wondering now how to allow room for all of it.  At once, one at a time, several now, not later... whatever authentic configuration wants and needs to happen in any given moment.  Can I allow for the reality that today my artist self and my lover self and cranky self were very wide awake?  Two of those aspects of me were sorely stifled today, because my brain was so intent on shutting up anything that would deviate me from the task at hand. 

The Woman Mystery here is how to dance with it all as it spontaneously comes up in any given moment.  Or actually, the mystery is not to lead the dance at all, but hold space for it to unfold as is best and as it serves the higher purpose of my full expression as a Woman in this life. 

I take this with me into my week, into my art, into my loving, healing, cooking, and whatever else comes through in me.

Blessings from very muggy Long Beach.  :)

Art and Remembering Long Lost Love Rituals

I just posted this to my shop.   I got so wordy in my description of it, that I thought I would just add it here, as it became a journal entry anyway! 

"I remember over 12 years ago, I traveled to Cuba with my family for a few weeks. I had left behind my Love at the time, one of those intense loves that are prone to crazy longing and perhaps more drama then I cared to admit at the time. :) Communication was impossible from Cuba at that time, and I had so much I wanted to say to him.

After a few days of this, my artist self grabbed the few markers that I had and began using those magazines as stationary for my letters to him. As the days passed, my writing became less about my then Love, and more about how fun and inspiring it was to write whole pages of words over glossy colors, contours of faces, smaller text that served as boundaries for my extravagant handwriting. It was a whole new way of experiencing the magazines I sooo love still to this day.

So this lovely journal is an entire book, of glossy colors, text, shapes that are just waiting for some marker flair. I love it! And I know that the Arty Soul who grabs this sweet book will love it too!"

Did you ever do that?  Write whole magazines worth of letters?  I had an acquaintance one that had done that as well.  I haven't done it since, but creating this journal has definitely inspired me to give it another try.  It saddens me to think of all the handwritten letters I have created in my day, and how I just don't do that anymore.  Emails, blog posts, voicemails... all the time.  Actually writing a letter?  Haven't done it in years.  And I was such a pen pal in my youth...  (Francesca love,  I miss our mail art!  Perhaps?  :)

So my lovelies, go find some magazines to write letters in, or to use as a journal, or buy my journal!  :)  Whatever you do, find some time to write.  Its an art that transcends time.

Sending you all inspired Saturday conversations with yourself, those you love, and new acquaintances.

My Boys

I had to share this picture.  This is our version of the Family Bed!  I walked into our bedroom, wondering why everything was so quiet in the house, and this is what I found...  Jon practicing his Mandarin characters on his iPhone, while Tucker napped next to him. 

Its a lovely and busy life here these days.  I miss having the time to come here and muse about it.  Jon and I both have our individual projects that we are completely immersed in, and we are finding creative ways to support one another in the others endeavors.  We're dancing with it and I'm grateful that in it all there is time for delicious moments like this. 

My Mom can't stand the idea of a dog in the bed.  Many people can't actually, but how can you resist a dog that insist on being human by picking the fluffy pillow for his head, and cuddling against his Papa like this?  (if you look closely, you can see Tucker hair all over Jon's shirt)  :)

Anyway, I'm just checking in.  Letting you all know I'm still here, lurking, wishing, longing to come back into the mix.  I have the next few days to myself as Jon and Tucker have headed up to the cabin to work on the remodeling going on up there.  I get to work on my art projects, meet with girlfriends, do my toes, and catch up on your lives!

Oh and a huge PS!  Excuse the looks of this place while I continue working on shifting things around on this page.  I am working on a new banner, and new blog rolls and other goodies.  I'm just a bit slow with the whole thing.

Much love,
e

My Sacred Life Sunday: Stillness Expanded

Sacred Life Sunday

Creating time for stillness has been a challenge lately.  Life is a flurry of activities and I'm finding myself sinking into the habit of feeling as if there is no time for the important things, like meditating.

This weekend, I made it a point to do it despite the pressures my schedule seemed to impose on my brain.  What I discovered is what I always learn when I take time to be still and breathe - taking time to be still somehow creates greater space and time throughout the day. 

Its like some alchemical quantum phenomenon.  Somehow the hours in a day stretch a bit more, life goes by at a more spacious pace, and I'm able to be productive in a steady, centered and unfrenetic manner. 

So this is my returning this weekend.  Returning inward to time out, time to just Be, being still for some unspecified time, allowing the alchemy of meditation and breath to take place within and without me.

I send you all much peace and love today,
e

New Moon In Aries 2008

This New Moon occured last Friday, April 5th. 

This is the first New Moon of Spring.  Aries is the first one out the gate, the child, new beginnings, fire, passion, individuality.  This is the beginning. 

And I am feeling so inspired this year by the energy of Spring, that I am going to not go by the usual format I have used in the past with my New Moon reports.  Instead I am going to drop in some questions:

As you emerge from the slumber of Winter and into the newness of Spring, what do you bring forth with you?

What are you offering up as your gift to the world?

What is Spring Fever igniting for you?

What are the ways that you can tap into the deep feelings of emergence that Spring is here to gift you with?

And what do you look like, feel like, sound like, move like while in the state of birthing yourself into a more vibrant, evolve, aware adn beautiful you?

I send you gorgeous flowers for you hair, a deliciously lusty lovers kiss, and countless opportunities to walk barefoot on the grass.

Blessings,

e

Be Inspired...

The imagery and cinematography along with the amazing music just sent my spirit soaring.  The ending had me in tears and feeling like I wanted to leap in that way that you know you can in the core of your innocent child self.  Have a magical and freeing day.

My Sacred Life Sunday: Reading

My Sacred Life Sunday

I am reading this again for the third time.  Its been quite a while and it feels like coming home to an old and significant friend.  I am circling with sisters again after a long break, and the Sacred Space created by a circle of Women is so potent.  It pulls me back into the bones of my femininity. 

I believe every woman should have this book and read it quietly to herself as a meditation, to her sisters in tones of importance, secret keys revealed, and to the young ones in a voice of potent knowing.  This book is a soul reclamation.

Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Ph.D shares in the very beginning of the book,

"We are filled with a longing for the wild.  There are few culturally sanctioned antidotes for this yearning.  We were taught to feel shame for such a desire.  We grew our hair long and used it to hide our feelings.  But the shadow of Wild Woman still lurks behind us during our days and in our nights.  No matter where we are, the shadow that trots behind us is definitely four-footed."

and

"Healthy wolves and healthy women share certain psychic characteristics:  keen sensing, playful spirit, and a heightened capacity for devotion.  Wolves and women are relational by nature, inquiring, possessed of great endurance, and strength.  They are deeply intuitive, intensely concerned with their young, their mate and their pack.  they are experienced in adapting to constantly changing circumstances; they are fiercely stalwart and very brave."

All this by page 4. 

As this new cycle of seasons begins, I encourage you to give this book to yourself.  If, like me, you have already read it, read it again.  Let this be a path back to the heart of your core as a woman.  Lets allow the path for our unfolding freedom and wildness to begin again!

I am so feeling this in the air.  So in-tuned to a drum beating in the far distance, beckoning a huge shift back into the truth of who I am... the Truth of who we are as Women.

Now, I know that my soul brothers out there come and read this blog from time to time.  My intention is not to exclude you, or discount your Sacred Wildness.  But for this day, with this book, I send this note to my Soul Sisters.  Hold space for us as we make our way into more of who we are.

Blessings to all of you,
e

Spring...

Its been a while...

Much has been germinating, incubating, bubbling slowly to the surface, getting ready to peak faces out from under the fertile soil.  I have missed coming here to write and read of our souls journey.  I almost wonder if I am ready? 

I have been diving into creative projects, adding pieces to my store, creating commissioned journals for beautiful souls wanting to document their journey, tending to the garden of my relationship, changing the comforts of my home, dancing, taking pictures, and preparing.

I am feeling like this Spring Season is ushering in a new time, pure beginnings, and a sense of boundlessness that I want to just fall back into in a state of blissful surrender. 

As the days come I will share more of what loveliness is transpiring.  For now...

enjoy the start of Spring my friends!