LunarMusings

Full Moon in Taurus 2009

Taurus... earthy, fixed, sensual, slow, physical.  Its an interesting energetic, because as I sit here reading about all the things that are happening astrologically with this Full Moon, I am brought back to what I have been practicing here now for a while:  How does this Moon feel for me?  Its never just that the moon is full and in a particular sign, but its what house it falls in for you, and what other transits are effecting the vibration of this moon.  So the focus here can't be on giving you a definition of what you are suppose to be feeling, but rather to facilitate both yours and my connection to how the moon is effecting the personal inquiry that is called for.

Right now for me there are a few things up.  I am seeing bounty creep into the day to day of my life.  Sweet little reminders that the seeds that I have planted over the last two years, seeds that felt so arduous in the planting, have begun to reap fruit in a slow and and tentative manner.  I am also deep in the excavation of my journey with planning.  I'm facing, for the first time it seems, the reality that I have never really planned for much in my life.  I haven't planned my life at all.  Always letting the winds guide me, remaining open to whatever spontaneously came up, I find that now at the age of 38, there are very key elements to my life that are missing because I didn't plan for them.

In all this its the concrete day to day that seems to come up and reveal itself as important.  Its interesting to observe, because I am really talking about the mundane day to day.  Things like, consciously drinking my green tea in the morning and my soothing herbal tea at night so as not to disrupt my sleep.  Rituals really.  Almost as if since the bigger plan isn't set in place, the small detailed plans of each day want to be established so as to give me a deeper sense of security and rootedness.  This needs to be sat with more...

The other awareness I am having is that there has always been a deeper resistance for me to plan, one that was deeper then the on the surface attitude, that I was a bohemian go with the flow kind of girl.  That icky truth is that I didn't want to plan for something, commit to it and then miss out on something else that might come along.  That and, I didn't want to be responsible.  There. 

I know intellectually that my life is a journey.  I have always been committed to growth and learning and self facing.  I know that even though I have never exercised my planning muscle, it can still work and grow in strength.  I know I can do this now if I chose.  I am just caught in a terror over what price I have actually paid for 38 years of no planning. 

It feels right now, like concretizing things is important.  Daily rituals, anchors throughout my day that keep me feeling a sense of solidity so that I may practice this art of planning in the bigger scheme of things.  

This is my Full Moon in Taurus.  How is it for you?

Full Moon in Aries 2009

Full Moon in Aries.  Can you feel it?  I have been buzzing with the energy of this moon since yesterday.  Last night Luna was shining her big face into every single window of the house. And although I can sleep with light, with sounds and with others around me awake and talking, last night I was just... ON. 

These days, with these posts I am tending to just post what I'm picking up.  We know Aries is a fire sign, the first sign, cardinal, independent, strong willed, intense.  But what about how the moon felt for you?  To you?  For me last night, it was like I could see.  I tried to go to bed around midnight, and then had to get back up.  My eyes were wide open, and although my mind wasn't racing with thoughts, there were still words that needed to be written. 

I quietly made my way back up to the loft and pulled out my journal and just wrote and wrote and wrote.  It feels as if this fiery full Moon is burning the veils that were hanging before my eyes, and things were and are clear.  I have no other way to explain it. 

I'm still buzzing, and awake, and checking in with myself and with the Moon often.  What do I need right now?  What do I know now?  What is wanting to be revealed? What is it I need in order to remain present with what is coming through about my life and the world around me?  How am I experiencing this particular Moon that is different then any other Full Moon before it?

Check in with yourselves.  Make note.  There is much She is broadcasting right now for us to tune in to.

Full Moon in Aquarius 2009

"This is the Full Moon to honor freedom, idealism, humanitarianism, egalitarianism, and the revolutionary impulse toward reform, without causing harm to anyone. Aquarius is the impulse to raise-up everyone and leave no one behind. So in service to these calls to action, become responsible and find out what is really happening around you. Get involved in your community, volunteer your time, and raise awareness in your neighborhood. It’s summer, have a block party and raise funds for a good cause."

by Lisa Dale Miller

I gotta tell you that this description doesn't resonate for me at all.  But then again that's the beauty of astrology, all these aspects affects us through the filter of our own chart, and where the general themes are universal, how we each receive it is very personal indeed. 

Aquarius, for me, is the most ungrounded of the air signs, and being an air sign myself, (Libra), I find that for me the energy right now is too broad, to open for interpretation and just scattered.  I can't get my mind to focus clearly and although I am desperately feeling the need to cut down all external stimulus to zero, that isn't happening or helping either.

For me these times are teachers.  Teaching me to BE in it.  Just be in the fullness of the whirling chaos of my mind and my energetic environment.  It is what is.  And struggling to avoid it or change it or Work at something to distract myself is in many ways missing the point of the larger practice of being in the moment and experiencing life in its fullness.

This is how i feel right now. This is how I am receiving this energy right now.  And that is... as it is.  Tell me about what you feel today with this big juicy lunar energy.

*small note of joy... I took this picture of Amy while she was 3cm dialated!  Her bambina was waiting quite graciously for us to do this photo shoot.  I so bow to the beauty of Sacred Motherhood and all its mysteries...*

Full Moon in Capricorn 2009

Found this at Lisa Dale Miller's site:

"If you feel like you are pushing a huge boulder up a steep hill on this Full Moon in Capricorn, blame it on retrograde Jupiter, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto and Chiron. Ouch! Well, what other Full Moon could face this kind of struggle by shrugging its shoulders, and saying, “So what else is new?” Thank you Saturn, ruler of Capricorn, the great teacher of how to handle hardship, struggle and reality, with commitment, follow-through and guts. So though this is the Full Moon to celebrate goals and achievement, with this kind of planetary resistance to moving forward, we can also celebrate small steps, realistic goal-setting, and being successful when faced with tremendous limitations. Going forward has its right time and right place. This is the night to look within, connect with one’s own sense of proper timing and trust the wisdom that arises from this kind of inquiry. Remember retrograde planets are ideal for inner work, especially with Mercury (mind) in Cancer."

Nuff said...

Full Moon in Sagittarius 2009

*this is our view at sunset from the lanai (deck)*

The Full Moon today is in Sagittarius.  I like Sagittarius... its lighthearted, expansive, explorational and all about the journey.  Whether the journey is inward, out into the world or into the depths of relationship, religion, spirituality or whatever else it can find.  Its a fire sign, so its a very active journeying, as well as a fervent drive that impulses all this action.

Full Moons are the culmination of energy in the lunar cycle.  Its about feeling the fullness of what is in and around you energetically and physically at the that time.  For me it is also about celebration.  Bringing in the joy and celebrating what is in your life at this time.

Today take some time in your own way to really assess your own journeys, both outward and inward.  Where are you going?  Why are you going there?  And how has it expanded your life?  Celebrate that.  Alone, with family, with friends.  Lift a wine glass up to yourself in honor of how far you have come and where this journey of your life has taken you.

And for me?  Well... my own journey into the realms of receiving and abundance have lead me here. A place of receiving a gorgeous gift of being in Maui for one whole month, in a lovely home that comes with an extravagant red BMW Z3 convertible to zip around the island with!  Both free, both amazing.  This sounds so not spiritual, but honestly, it is.  The universe is filled with miracles, and one of them is that playing and savoring the luxuries in life are important to the enriching of the soul. 

Aloha loves!

Full Moon in Virgo 2009

Full Moon in Virgo today at 7:38 PM PST. 

Energetics:  Virgo is an mutable earth sign ruled by the planet Mercury.  It is ruler of the 6th astrological house and has for its symbol the virgin.  Virgo is very much about health, healing, hygeine, perfectionism, organization, consistency, systems, and analysis.  Couple this with the Moon being in Her fullness and this energy is expanded, pulsing and fueling whatever is being propelled into the world manifest. 

With this Lunar cycle beginning with the New Moon in Pisces, the work started was geared towards the dream world, meditation, transcendence.  As that work has continued to unfold in our own personal process how does the build up become affected by this Full Moon in Virgo - this earth, health focused, consistent sign?

This Moon is about celebrating our bodies, looking at what its needs are and embarking on the task of meeting those needs in a celebratory way.  Taking responsibility for our health (virgo) through the act of meditating (pisces) can take on many forms.  A ritual perhaps where you paint a self portrait picture of your thriving healthy body and then spend some time meditating on it, setting up an altar with it as the focal point so that you can come to it each morning and set the intention for self care. Another great Full Moon ritual to embark can be found here.  Jamie's Full Moon Dreamboards are a fabulous idea and I am considering incorporating this into my own Lunar work as well.  Great way to keep your altar updated for each Lunar Cycle as well.

Its really about how your New Moon intentions will come into full bloom with the energetic pull of this Full Moon and its sign.  And so another way to work with this Full Moon in Virgo is to journal about where your body is right now.  Is their dis-ease?  Are you thriving in the way you know your body was meant to?  Where do you feel blockages, places of holding, and chronic challenges?  Then sit with the question:  How is my physical health a reflection of my spiritual health?  What is my body trying to reveal to me about my spiritual flow/connection/path?

For me, my meditation practice this cycle has been an incredible mirror for how I do and do not care for my body's health and how my lack of physical attention to my body is so rooted in self loathing.  Each day brings more clarity and relief from the heaviness of this loathing and I am celebrating.  Celebrating in big and small ways.  Its in the meal I made for myself this morning, the long bath and the session for dry brushing followed by a delicious layer of coconut oil all over my body, and the soft fabrics I have wrapped myself in while I go about my day.  I have embraced myself literally and while doing that, I reminded myself that I don't really loathe myself now.  What I am unraveling in this regard now is old imprints from a life many many many lifetimes ago.  And today, and each morning as I sit down to honor the Goddess within and without me, I bow to myself, give me a nod, and say yes... I am worthy of the utmost care on every level, body, mind, spirit.

Happy Full Moon lovelies!

Full Moon In Leo 2009

Full Moon in Leo yesterday at around 6 AM PST.  Its a big moon and we will be feeling it for a couple more days.  A Leo moon is grand, expressive, firey.  He is all about big big big.  And this is the time to really surrender and celebrate our personal creativity. 

Where this lunar cycle began with Visionary Aquarius, the time to really look at what we created in our visioning and surrender to the grandness of that vision is here.  Step back and really look at the dreams you conjured up during your new moon work and just like this video I posted, dare to run in and dive head first into it.  Surrender to the things you dreamed and visioned for yourself, wrap yourself in them like a fine velvet coat that adorns you in grandeur and Be Big. 

This is all part of manifesting our lives in the way we visioned them.  First there is the planning, the brainstorms, the courage to actually want something and owning that desire.  Then the next step?  Dive in, feel it, savor the possibilities and begin the process of trying them on. 

What does surrendering to your personal vision look like for you this week?  Post it here and let us all be inspired together.

Full Moon in Cancer 2009

This evening at 7:27 Pacific Standard Time we have our Full Moon in Cancer.  I've been feeling this one too.  She is an emotional watery moon, letting us feel the fullness of our feelings and sentimental attachments from the depths of our hearts.

Here is a quote from AstroWisdom:

"...With this in mind, welcome to the Full Moon of the heart: a time to swim in the unbounded ocean of love that connects us with the rhythm of life and all other sentient beings. Love is everywhere, in every particle, in every wave. It is the glue that binds us to our planet and all existent life upon it. So if you have lost faith in love, or have a relationship in turmoil, Venus in Pisces, Saturn in Virgo, Pluto/Mars/Sun in Capricorn, make this a “get real and get committed” Full Moon: a Moon for setting an intention to love yourself and your partner/family even through the hard times. Jupiter, Mercury, North Node, Chiron, and Neptune in Aquarius will add the courage to talk back to fear. You really can risk trying something new or committing to a change of mind that has been a long time coming."

This Full Moon is in my 5th astrological house of pleasure and creativity.  This has been so up for me in the last two weeks.  I have been so conflicted and mournful over what I haven't created in this life of mine.  My gremlins have been in full force lately, and rather then coming up grateful while taking inventory of my life thus far, I come up feeling directionless and frustrated that I haven't created more in the world. 

Today I woke up at 5 AM drowning in this.  These last two full moons have been so intense for me, and I am so clear that it has everything to do with how sensitive I am becoming to the Moon's influence while up here on this mountain.

This is all part of the Transmutation occuring this year for me.  I'm very conscious today that I  have been creating in a very directionless manner.  I have spoken of this to a handful of you already, but its coming up for me more and more.  I create in circles around the THING that I want to be doing more then anything else.  For years this has been the case.  And day by day I'm reaching that place where there is no longer any room to hide or be afraid of launching myself into the world with this particular creation. 

Today I woke up feeling choked by my fear.  If I do this thing in the world and it fails, what will become of me?  How could I continue on?  What will the rest of my life end up like?  Stunted, miserable, alone, under a bridge...?  Why do our worst fears always end with living under a bridge???

I have been hiding all day in this room, slowing working on something, chatting with friends on the phone on and off throughout the day, and before sunset Jon came up and asked me to go on a walk with him. I needed this, even though I would have not done so on my own, preferring to hide inside instead.   He lead me up the hill behind the house, and in the gusty wind, my lack of physical stamina almost killed me.

He took us to a rock overlooking the mountain range, the sun setting behind it and the strong winds having their way with the trees in the distance and all around us.  It was gorgeous, and he was beautiful, and I was overwhelmed by the love in the air, the love in my life, and how it has the capacity to restore us in ways that we can't even imagine. 

As he sat there behind me, pointing out the explosion of colors being created between the Sun and the mountain ridge, I realized how black and white fear can be.  If what I do fails, somehow so will the rest of my life.  Everything will be bad, or everything will be good.  Its crazy making.  I also began to feel that if no matter what isn't working in my, there will always be those things that do work and work well, then what do I really have to lose by trying to truly follow this dream? 

Its all swirling for me right now.  And I'm swimming in the soupy whirlpool of this moon.  But I'm feeling bouied by the love I feel and am on the recieving end of... and for me, given where this moon is placed, I think thats exactly what needs to be clear in order for me to launch myself creatively. 

Full Moon in Gemini 2008

This one has been a biggie for me.  So much is stirring within.  More then anything I think its the expanse that I am having a reaction to.  So much space, so much time, so much vast emptiness.  Last night I stepped outside to be with the Moon.  This picture doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of how gorgeous a night it was.  I just stood there, in the middle of all these trees, and all the forest creatures, the rocks, the clouds meandering their way across the lit night sky.  All I could do was breathe.

And then I tilted my face up to Her, asking Her for more of what I am already experiencing and fearing I can't handle more of.  I asked for Her to activate me.  Charge me.  Imbue me with the potent electricity needed to be more of what this moment was inviting me to be.  Then I breathed some more.

I marveled at how bright it was outside, and wandered around a bit.  Everything behind the cabin is on an incline.  The entire mountain is our backyard it seems and as I wandered I was wishing for a clearing that was relatively flat.  A girl like me needs spaces like this you see... how else can Witchy Libra Goddess Girl dance naked under the full moon?   Well... maybe when its warmer.  :)

I am shifting in ways that are unfamiliar to me.  And really what I want is to just dive into it.  Dive into this primitive shamanic journey of the body and soul and see where I end up.  Its an edge of the cliff that I am being drawn to.  And just as I typed that a part of me thinks, "yes, and its important to balance that with my worldly self, my partner, my work, my social life."  But really?  There is no balance when you are called to leap over the edge.  Something is calling me. 

I'm being called.  And I don't know by what or who, and to what.  But my core.  That deep center is getting more and more hungry for it. And if I still myself enough I know that the call is coming from within me.

I use to give all sorts of information for each full moon post.  The sign, what house it was in for me, and what that meant.  I'm not there today, this week, this year.  I'm in the raw truth of what I feel.  My mind has no answers.  My Being just knows the call.

The Moon reached her fullness today at 8:37 am PST.

Subtle Work, Subtle Awareness

I have had really restless uncomfortable sleep for the last two nights.  Its almost as if I am in a bad mood while sleeping.  The dreams don't really mean anything or go anywhere... just random snippets of things that frustrate more then anything.  I'm not having the anxiety dreams or the racing thoughts that usually happen when I'm stressed out.  This is different and frustrating because not only am I tired, but it feels so incongruent with how my happiness over this place in my life keeps deepening with each day.

Last night, I was on Facebook, and had the following exchange with two of my contacts:  (I have only included my friend's first initials to protect the lunar creatures that they are.) :)

Elena is restless tonight... 10:24pm

"T" at 10:34pm December 10 via Facebook Mobile

Me too. In bed. Can't sleep. Wtf.

Elena Rego at 10:38pm December 10

What is that about??? Last night I was exhausted, and fell asleep, but it was the most restless sleep ever. And tonight I'm feeling the same. Not sure what is going on.

"A" at 10:41pm December 10

moon...

Elena Rego at 10:45pm December 10

Yes, I thought that too, although I am generally pretty calm when the moon is in Taurus. It could be the impending full moon, or who knows what else is going on out there.

I use to get solar flare reports via email. Not sure why they stopped sending me emails anymore. But it was really interesting to tract anxiety levels in myself and the people around me when we would have a huge solar flare.

The energies are definitely stirring though. I am still seeing 4 legged spirits walking around everywhere...

"A" at 10:48pm December 10

http://science.nasa.gov/headlines/y2008/09dec_fullmoon.htm

 Elena Rego at 10:51pm December 10

:) you rock! Thanks for this!


I read the NASA article on the full moon coming up and figured that this certainly had something to do with the energy running through me.  But this morning I woke up in a state.  My sleep was terrible and I just couldn't get a handle on what was going on.  So up to my loft i went and set the space to do a long meditation. 

My teacher passed down an elemental mantra meditation that one of her teachers had passed on to her.  It clears out the power centers of the body, or the chakras.  And I thought it wise to spend a longer period of time then usual doing this meditation.  I felt out of sorts and not sure how to tap into what is happening around me. 

I did the meditation along with a few other mantra practices that I do and then sat in silence.  Wisdom came through, but I'm not sure how to articulate it. 

I've been settling down here.  Letting the quite and the energetic naturalness of this mountain have its way with recalibrating my being.  Subtle shifts are happening with each moment that passes for me here.  And it all happens in layers.  I sense that the Moons full approach began to stir some stagnant spaces within me.  The frustrated energy being evidence of this.  Once I finished my Elemental Mantras and cleared some of the energy, a tidal wave of physical anxiety rushed through my body.  It was a huge surge.  And I sat with it for a good hour and then it subsided.  A release.

I'm grateful for the space.  It literally feels like I am living in a space carved out of the normal time that I have been living my entire life.  And as this space continues to affect my existence, not only am I more senstive to the energy running in and around me, but it is allowing deeper layers of me come up for clearing, for shifts and healing.

I feel very quiet now.  In my body and very slow in each activity I engage in.  Present.  I'm becoming aware that I will need to attend to the subtle much more in order to be present for things like this as they will happen more and more.  This is so acutely the work of this winter season.

The Full Moon is tomorrow.  I will be posting some words on her tomorrow.

Blessings and Mindfullness.
e